Before I begin, thanks Susan for your 5 tells – they’re hilarious!
Now, when it comes to our favorite literature is it possible to ever read too much of it? What are some of the tells of overindulgence in romance? Let’s take a look!
You Know You Read Too Much Romance When…
- Most of your email is author newsletters telling you about latest releases, contests, and book signings.
- You insist on bringing a chaperone on romantic dates; even though you’re 25 years old.
- You own a digital copy of every print romance book on your favorite’s shelf.
- Your favorite’s shelf is now the entire bookcase and the area in front of it on the floor.
- You have a plot trope, character type, or preference you are too embarrassed to share with other romance readers.
- Your bookshelves are classified first by subgenre, then by author.
- After kissing each other breathless, you accidentally say, “Please Lord Mark take me now to your bedchamber.”
- He says, “I know-I know you can’t spend the night with me because your aunt Lady Marie will start the rumor-mill.”
- Your fictional boyfriend is Mr. Darcy, Mr. Thornton, or another romantic alpha hero.
- You once had to question where the hymen was located, because most romance novels have the hero penetrate it somewhere inside the vagina instead of at the opening.
- You clip the covers off your romances and make a mantitty wallpaper collage.
- The name Vladimir de Laaf, the Duke of Longwood, sounds like a valid name for a man and Lady Saramia, the Widow of Evesham, makes for an equally good heroine name.
- In your mind, being unwed and over twenty is a crime.
- When making love-you find yourself moaning, “Oh yes, all the way to the hilt!”
- You’re actually disappointed he showed up in his Lexus….where’s the black stallion?
- You own or are following every romance blog you encounter or have written blog posts for them.
- If the first thing you can find in your purse is your latest romance read.
- You’ve attended more than five romance conventions just because. Jane Austen and Regency period conventions count, even if they aren’t about books at all, because the subgenres are prominent.
- You can spot a secret baby within a 100 yards.
- If you ever daydreamed about being a heroine in one.
Bonus 21: If you’re like me than you’ve come to the conclusion, there’s never too romance in your life!
Photo Credits: rtbookreviews