20 Ways to Know You Read Too Much Romance

Before I begin, thanks Susan for your 5 tells – they’re hilarious!

Now, when it comes to our favorite literature is it possible to ever read too much of it? What are some of the tells of overindulgence in romance? Let’s take a look!

You Know You Read Too Much Romance When…

  1. Most of your email is author newsletters telling you about latest releases, contests, and book signings.
  2. You insist on bringing a chaperone on romantic dates; even though you’re 25 years old.
  3. You own a digital copy of every print romance book on your favorite’s shelf.
  4. Your favorite’s shelf is now the entire bookcase and the area in front of it on the floor.
  5. You have a plot trope, character type, or preference you are too embarrassed to share with other romance readers.

hqn2

  1. Your bookshelves are classified first by subgenre, then by author.
  2. After kissing each other breathless, you accidentally say, “Please Lord Mark take me now to your bedchamber.”
  3. He says, “I know-I know you can’t spend the night with me because your aunt Lady Marie will start the rumor-mill.”
  4. Your fictional boyfriend is Mr. Darcy, Mr. Thornton, or another romantic alpha hero.
  5. You once had to question where the hymen was located, because most romance novels have the hero penetrate it somewhere inside the vagina instead of at the opening.

harlequin-art-exhibit

  1. You clip the covers off your romances and make a mantitty wallpaper collage.
  2. The name Vladimir de Laaf, the Duke of Longwood, sounds like a valid name for a man and Lady Saramia, the Widow of Evesham, makes for an equally good heroine name.
  3. In your mind, being unwed and over twenty is a crime.
  4. When making love-you find yourself moaning, “Oh yes, all the way to the hilt!”
  5. You’re actually disappointed he showed up in his Lexus….where’s the black stallion?

hqn4

  1. You own or are following every romance blog you encounter or have written blog posts for them.
  2. If the first thing you can find in your purse is your latest romance read.
  3. You’ve attended more than five romance conventions just because. Jane Austen and Regency period conventions count, even if they aren’t about books at all, because the subgenres are prominent.
  4. You can spot a secret baby within a 100 yards.
  5. If you ever daydreamed about being a heroine in one.

Bonus 21: If you’re like me than you’ve come to the conclusion, there’s never too romance in your life!

Photo Credits: rtbookreviews

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13 Comments

  1. Haha! This is a fantastic list. I don’t do any of these things, except maybe the last one, but I know where they all come from!

  2. I never thought of doing #11! Project!

    Did most of the rest of them though I don’t think that it’s possible to read “too much” romance.

  3. I was going to say — the hero, your hero, driving up in a black Lexus might not be all that bad. Especially if you’re a fan of vintage Jayne Ann Krentz! But I guess you’re talking historicals here, so I say…yes, yes, yes!

  4. 16.You own or are following every romance blog you encounter or have written blog posts for them.

    What’s your point? OK, I’m cracking up here! That was a great list, and yes, I KNOW I read too many romances. Write them, too, lol. Though I don’t carry them in my purse. I have learned it’s easier to bring another PB since there’s less to explain. And if I see one more eye roll over a sexy cover…*G*

    Excellent list!

  5. From Twitter:

    stefanpinto: @reviewromance #19 is clever although admittedly frightening

    laughs evilly…

  6. I’m guilty of too many on that list & The Duke of Longwood is not only an an acceptable name but he’d
    have a “Long” list of women waiting to be courted.(evil laugh)
    I do carry a romance novel in my purse & my Kindle is actually an extension of my left hand. (LOL)

  7. Love the list!! Now, I’m going to add one more romance to read…my first book was just published and released, maybe it will become one your visitors love to read!!!

    Too much romance is not an option!!!
    Lisa Renee Faust 🙂
    http://www.eloquentbooks.com/TheRoadToLove.html
    http://www.myspace.com/road_to_love

  8. Is it bad that I read this post and thought, “I haven’t done a lot of these things…Challenge!”

    On a side note, I love the photos from Harlequin’s The Heart of a Woman exhibit.

  9. Samanther

    Hurhur, “Duke of Longwood.” *giggles uncontrollably*

  10. Thank you Samanther! I totally got a kick out name creation lol 😉

  11. Sharon S.

    okay, this is funny. I don’t care who you are 🙂 Take me to the hilt! heehee. will share this goodness…

  12. Rawr! 😀 LMAO

  13. nora platas

    Lol you make me laugh.. so. Where is your black stallion .

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