Top Ten Items Every Romance Hero Needs

No hero should leave home without these 10 items in his repertoire:

hero

  1. Good Looks – if gazing at him doesn’t get your motor running and your engine purring, he’s not the hero of your dreams.
    • Synonyms: Casanova, Adonis
  2. Skills in the Bedroom – or in the shower, on top of the kitchen table, on the living room floor, against a wall, on the stairs, in the car, ahem… you know where this is going.
    • Synonyms: In SBTB land it frequently goes by the term Heroic Wang of Mighty Loving.
  3. Brawn and Brains – nothing kills a hero’s heroism faster than stupidity. Intelligence is sexy!
    • Synonyms: Nerd, Geek
  4. Charm – if he can’t charm his way into your knickers with a smile, something’s wrong.
    • Synonyms: Magnetism, Thrall, Charisma, Magic
  5. Domestic Skills – if he cooks, cleans, and gives orgasms in sets of three or more, he’s never allowed out of the house. His name is slave and he answers to Master.
    • Synonyms: Maid, Chef, Sex God
  6. Brooding – all heroes brood, it’s built into their genetic makeup. We females simply can’t resist a good brood, it’s our kryptonite.
    • Synonyms: Sulking, Moping, Pouting
  7. Possessiveness – they have it, how often they express it is another matter to be taken up by the subgenre or author.
    • Synonyms: Beast, Alpha Male; Green Eyed Monster, Jealousy
  8. Wealth – not just money, the hero must also be wealthy in knowledge, social connections, life skills, common sense… hold on the last one until later in the novel, because otherwise there might not be a story.
    • Synonyms: Resources
  9. Stubbornness – you didn’t read that wrong. They’re male, it’s one of the few flaws we allow them, but only when it serves our purposes.
    • Synonyms: Persistence, Perseverance; Inflexibility, Pigheadedness
  10. Heroine – what’s the point of #1-9 if he doesn’t have #10?
    • Synonyms: She came, she conquered, and he’s forever enslaved to the Magic Hoo-Hoo.

Photo Credits: d_vdm

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9 Comments

  1. *snicker* Excellent! 🙂

  2. OMGosh that was so funny and SO TRUE

  3. I’d get in line! Very funny!

  4. common sense… hold on the last one until later in the novel, because otherwise there might not be a story.

    HAHAHA! Oh, too classic. I love this list. 🙂 And it’s all too true.

  5. Susan S.

    How bout’ a hero that tries to be “aloof ” & distance himself from the heroine. Hero pretends he wants nothing to do with her, when in reality he desires her more than anything. That’s sexy methinks.
    Love your list -so true.

  6. Rossy

    :snickers: I’m loving this list!

  7. Sharon S.

    love this!! 🙂

  8. Sue K

    Great list. I especially agree with Susan S about the ‘aloof’ hero. It’s always so much fun to watch him fall and fall hard!

  9. Emily W

    Hmm.. good looks, skills in the bedroom and charm I definitely agree with, but I like romance novels that mix it up a little bit.
    In a recent favorite, Sinful Liasons by JC Gardner (http://www.booksbyjcg.com), the leading man is an heir that spent away all of his trust fund. His family’s definitely rich.. but I like the smattering of imperfection in the hero. It makes the novel more believable and sets up the plot nicely. He’s still a hunky hero worthy of lust, though!

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