Unanswered Harry Potter Question #7: What is the profession of Harry Potter’s parents?

(This article is humorous, not factual.)

From a letter sent to Harry Potter from Remus Lupin comes the answer to what James and Lily Potter did for their careers.

Dear Harry,

You must realize that the wizarding world was going to war with Voldemort at the time. Dumbledore had already recruited us for the Order of the Phoenix and as you know I was the werewolf liaison. I was running around Europe scrounging up support for the cause so I didn’t get to see your parents all that much before they went under the Fidelius Charm. What I know could be what they did or James’ idea of a joke and I wouldn’t put it past him to try it. From your mother and father’s letters I got this.

James Potter worked in a bubblegum factory. Apparently he chose the profession because Voldemort once interned as a janitor under Groundskeeper Ogg so he could stay at Hogwarts one summer and not return to the orphanage. Or so Dumbledore told me one night while drinking Lemon Schnapps.

Bubblegum is the only thing Dumbledore and Voldemort agree upon. I guess they both think its evil or something because students stick pieces of it under chairs, desks, between book pages, in keyholes of doorknobs, in the middle of stairwells, inside bathroom stalls, well you get the drift. I have a feeling Dumbledore also pulled such an internship at Hogwarts, though to be honest I can’t imagine him ever doing it.

A summer spent scrubbing it off the Muggle way taught Voldemort (and Dumbledore) 3 things:

  1. They did not want to be janitors.
  2. Sometimes scrapping gum off the scrapper is harder than getting it off the underside of a desk.
  3. Anybody who produced gum should die a horrible death.

Seems excessive, yes? I don’t know why this has to do with James’ position at a gum factory other than that it really got under Dumbledore’s skin… and perhaps Voldemort’s as well.

Now for your mother, Lily. She started in the Ministry as an Undersecretary, but before long she was pregnant with you and they found out. The wizarding world is not very forward. We don’t have maternity leave, why do you think Molly Weasley is a stay at home mother instead of being out in the workforce? Your mother was advocating to change that when she died. I would not be surprised to find that Hermione completes her mission. I don’t see her surviving as a stay at home mother, do you?

Your furry friend,

Remus Lupin

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